I just realized that internet world is such a crowded place to live in. Before starting this blog site, I set a strong intention to myself that I will write and publish for myself and not for others. I am rooting this from my past mistake – wherein I allow myself to be changed for the sake of attention, online competition and social pressures.
What internet and social media did to me?
I have once been a victim of social entitlement and saturated competition over the internet – where I do things mainly to get attention and praises from others.
- I developed a strong sense of competition over other writers.
- I was envious of others who get many followers, comments and likes on their posts.
- I doubted my capabilities because I could not make it to the crowd.
I struggled hard and for a long time dealing with this disease. Yes, I consider social entitlement through social media and internet a disease – because it is killing my true identity.
Setting new perspective in writing and blogging
I realized that internet is not a bad thing. It is just a tool provided for us to make our life better. But because of human nature that is filled with ego and selfishness, we make wrong of using it. We allow our pride to devour us and so we keep on finding ways how we can get to the top through this tool called internet.
As part of my healing process, I learned that I should make a shift of perspective on how I should use internet to cater my passion for writing and publishing.
My new perspective is simple. As I’ve mentioned on the first paragraph, “I set a strong intention to myself that I will write and publish for myself and not for others.”
(You can also read my other post, Why I Started My Online Diary)
As I write this diary entry, I am expressing my thoughts as if talking to myself alone and it makes me genuinely happy. Writing is my simplest yet profound joy.
Writing freely heals me and brings me back solely to my passion. Free from ego, selfishness and desire to be loved by men. What will I do with the praises, appreciation and love of men if I am completely happy and contented with the love I can create for myself through writing? 🙂